I Should Have Saved The First One

Luckily when I stood up, I still had my ass. Things would have been pointless without it. I put that in the, "Things that have gone right, today." column in my head and went back over the whole list. There was only one thing on it.
There was nothing to decide really. Not after I had sat down to think about it for a minute. I couldn't stay here for very long. Of that there was no doubt. The moss, it seemed had gotten it's taste of me and was coming for more. Slow moving vegetation or not, I was in no shape for any kind of wrestling match.
"Lost are you?" Said a voice directly behind me. It was so close that I jumped a bit at the sound of it. When I turned around to face the questioner, I almost shit on myself.
A bald eagle, standing almost a full head taller than I did, stood directly in front of me with an impatient look on his face. I can tell you honestly, that there is nothing that has ever happened to me, or anyone I know, that could come close to preparing me for a seven foot tall, talking bird. I went slack jawed at the sight of him and my tongue slipped out of my mouth and landed with a splat between my feet.
That was alarming.
I picked it up and stuffed it back into my mouth. No dignity could be salvaged at this point. I could feel it re-attach with a slight slurping sound. Then the taste came back to me and I found out that dirt is nasty in any reality. I tasted bile for a moment but fought that back. I would think that, not even a regular eagle would like being barfed on.
"Yeth." I said, trying to spit out the muck. "You could thay that."
"Let me guess," he said "Human, right?"
I could not help but blush.
"No," I replied defiantly. "I'm a squirrel but I left my heavy coat at home."
He screamed then. I thought that all my worries were about be ended in the blink of an eye. The talons on his feet could easily filet me like a fish.
It took me a few a moments before I realized that he was laughing. I blushed again thankful that eagle-boy was bent over slapping his knee.
"Amazing human," he finally exclaimed. "I never would have thought that a human could have a sense of humor." He shook his head trying not to start laughing again. "Can you imagine a half dressed squirrel sprinting from branch to branch?" He screamed again. I could not help but join him this time.
It was quit some time before he controlled himself again. He slapped me on the back, almost sending me to the ground, and started us walking out to the path.
"You know," he started. "When I first came down to you, I had every intention on throwing you back into the hole." He glanced at me from the corner of his eye. "I've decided to give you a chance though. I might even help you to get where your really going."
"Home?" I asked.
He stopped and looked hard into my eyes.
"Is that really where you were going?"
It seems that my answer should have been "Yes." But for some reason I knew that to be a lie.